I love the book of Nehemiah. It is one of my favorites. Nehemiah is a man who is heartbroken about the state of Israel's city and walls. When he cries out to God about this, God basically says, "Batter up." So Nehemiah takes on the huge task of rebuilding the walls of the city, and he finds that he is not alone. There are many Israelites ready and willing to do whatever it takes to complete this task, but they encounter much opposition. So much so, that they "did their work with one hand and held a weapon in the other and each of the builders wore his sword at his side as he worked" (Nehemiah 4:17-18). He says that half of the people did the work while the other half were equipped with spears, shields, bows and armor. Nehemiah tells the people, "Don't be afraid of them. Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome, and fight for your brothers, your sons and your daughters, your wives and your homes" (Neh. 4:14).
I love the visual of this passage. It is very much like a picture God put in my head a few weeks ago (I hope to paint it sometime so my eyes can see it too). As I struggled desperately one day, a dear friend told me, "Fear not, you and your family are surrounded by prayer warriors that are in full combat gear doing battle to protect you all. Occasionally, a demon of fear will get through, but remember we are here." All of these words and pictures come together in my mind. And I am reminded that if you want to win a battle, you don't fight alone. Last week, Katie and I went to a specialty store to consider options as her hair begins to let go. It was more than a little difficult for a 13 year old girl and her momma. As she repeatedly said the words, "I can't do this." I found myself repeating a variation of all of the above sentiments: "Katie, we have to do this. But you don't have to do this alone. I will do whatever it takes to make this easier for you, to fight this with you." So now my hair is shorter than it has ever been, and we are acquiring hats and beanies to wear together. Because, just like Nehemiah said, our God is great and awesome, but there is opposition and we are going to have to fight together. In the past several days, the fighting has let up. Katie has been recovering this week and feeling well. Her counts are good and her attitude is great. She is so herself (what a joy)! I feel like I have had a chance to lift my head and look around at those who are fighting for and with us. And can I just say that you are a beautiful bunch of warriors?! I stopped in to see some colleagues (I haven't been to work in over a month) and former colleagues, and they just wrapped me in hugs and encouragement. Some incredible friends have put together a 5K run/walk (affectionately called the 5Katie) in her honor and benefit. Another family who loves Katie dropped off a hat box full of hats they had collected. My sisters, sisters-in-law and some of Katie's friends have all cut their hair (some very short) to match their battle gear. As we start into round 2 tomorrow morning, I am grateful for the reminder that Katie is not fighting alone and we are not fighting alone. Please be in prayer for the week ahead. She has several days of infusions which means side effects, boredom, traveling, yuckiness, counts dropping, and kid juggling. Meals and childcare are covered for the week - thank you. Blessings, Sarah
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This week has been both uneventful and eventful. Both a blessing and a challenge. Both beautiful and disgusting. And sometimes all at once.
- Katie has had some mild aggravating physical symptoms which have been hard to get control of this week. - She was able to spend an evening with some friends from school which provided some girl time, laughs, hugs and normalcy. - Homebound instruction is going smoothly, and she has been able to keep up with her classmates in the major subjects. - Some of the 'downs' of chemotherapy are starting to set in. Working through those is proving to be difficult. She struggles. I struggle. We all hurt as we try to figure out how to help her shoulder those burdens. - Blood counts are improved this week. White blood cells back to normal, red blood cells slowly recovering. This is great because we want to stay on schedule for the next cycle of chemo as well as enjoy the holiday week with family. - We were astounded by the number of Team Katie t-shirts ordered this week. Oh, how that blessed us! Please use #teamkatiecobb when you post your pics so she can see all the purple. Another order will be sent in 2 weeks through Roy Kuhl Sports. - We had dinner together as a complete family more than once this week, eating some of our favorite foods. That was awesome and much needed. I loved hearing Katie pray for the team serving in Haiti this week and express gratitude for those who have loved and supported us. Psalm 16:11 - You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy. Blessings, Sarah I started to write a post yesterday evening about some of the spiritual stuff God is teaching me. I have lots of thoughts I want to share, but they don't always flow onto paper (or screen) nor do I have the time to write them all down. But God is most certainly walking through this with us and, many times, preparing the way ahead of us. There are so many stories already . . .
But I didn't finish the post last night because the words just were not coming, so I closed the computer and went to bed. And then today happened. And today sucked. I really don't want to share the details but it was just a physically, mentally, and emotionally difficult day for Katie and all of us. So I scrapped yesterday's post and this is the update you are getting. As follow up to recent prayer requests: Her white and red blood cell counts are both decreased but stable for now. Her appetite is okay and no significant nausea, but she really needs to stay hydrated and keep her strength up with good calories. She will be recovering for the next couple weeks as we await the next round of chemo. I am generally not an overprotective parent, but I am gonna be with this one. When you see Katie out and about, please control your facial contortions and do not give any piteous looks. If you normally hug her or say hi, go ahead. She would love that! Say what you always say. If she doesn't know you or you generally don't hug her when you see her in public, don't start now. Love her from afar and continue praying for her. I know everyone means well but, as a young girl, it is just weird when strangers hug her and tell her they are praying for her or constantly ask her how she is feeling. Sorry, it just is. Thanks for the food this week and other help with kids and the house. We are also very excited about TeamKatie shirts which are ready to be ordered through Roy Kuhl Sports. Blessings, Sarah After three days in the hospital receiving chemotherapy infusions and another visit for an injection this morning, Katie is finally home resting for a few days. She took several anti-nausea medications on a scheduled basis which, thankfully, were very effective. She has eaten fair and has had only a few complaints of feeling sickish so far. These are all blessings.
We are relieved to get these treatments started so as to prevent any further growth of the tumor or associated accumulation of fluid in her lung space, but it also makes the diagnosis a little more real than it was a week ago. I sat beside her the other day in the hospital room and watched as the nurses prepared to start her chemo regimen for the day. The chemo med is sent from a special pharmacy department where it is mixed and checked and rechecked and triple checked. Then, after she puts on gloves and a protective gown, the nurse brings it in the room in a special bag. She uses special IV tubing to infuse it into Katie's port. It's all so special. And I am acutely aware of so many precautions taken with the chemotherapy drugs that are now entering my child's body. No one else wants to touch it but my Katie is getting the full force of it. Chemo kills cancer cells. Cancer cells. Cancer. Oh, crud, for a few minutes I had forgotten. My kid has cancer. Chemo kills other cells besides just cancer cells which is why we have to deal with and worry about a multitude of side effects. So here are some prayer requests: - Katie's red blood cells are already down significantly after this first big hit of chemo. Please pray that these quickly build back up along with the white blood cells. She will have labs on Friday. - Her appetite is down a little, coupled with feeling blah. Plus she is a very picky eater so that makes it even harder to find what sounds good to her and offers calories. Please pray about this. Also, she likes homemade applesauce (without a lot of cinnamon) so if anyone has an extra jar around from their fall apples, that might be helpful. - We are planning to cut some hair this weekend to ease the effects of its loss. This is huge. There will be tears. Many prayers appreciated. We have felt incredibly blessed by so many of you in a multitude of ways. Thank you. The cards and gifts and meals and childcare and cleaning and so many other things have been given in sincere love and are so appreciated. But the prayers. Oh, the prayers are just as tangible and even more important to us right now. We are so grateful. Blessings, Sarah I love the story of Joshua and the Israelites crossing the Jordan River. In Joshua 1:6-9, God tells Joshua three times to "be strong and courageous." This is the life event that the Israelites have been preparing for since their birth, whether they knew it or not. God has been faithful to them. Many stories exist to prove his faithfulness thus far in their lives. But here they are in front of the most terrifying thing they have yet had to face.
In chapter 3, verse 3-4, the command goes out: "When you see the ark of the covenant of the Lord your God (that is, the symbol of God's presence and power) . . . you are to move out from your positions and follow it. Then you will know which way to go, since you have never been this way before." So the people break camp and prepare to cross the Jordan River which, verse 15 says, is at flood stage. And it is when "their feet touched the water's edge, the water from upstream stopped flowing. It piled up in a heap a great distance away. . . while the whole nation had completed the crossing on dry ground." The miracle didn't happen while they stood on the shore watching, only when they stepped into the river. So God said to me today: Look behind you. Can you see my faithfulness? Remember that time and this time and that time when I didn't leave you? But this is new territory. Overwhelming. Frightening. You are going to have to watch for my presence and follow me because you have not been this way before. Be strong and courageous, do not be terrified. I will go with you. But you are going to have to trust me enough to step into the flood before the rushing waters will stop. And when you pass through the waters, I will be with you. Have there been moments, hours, days of fear in the last two weeks? Yes. But when I look behind me, I see God. I see his faithfulness. When I look in front of me, I see a lot of unknowns. But I also see God. I see his faithfulness. Prayer request. Katie is tolerating the chemo well so far, but she is taking a lot of medicine to prevent nausea which then causes her to be very drowsy. It would be great to find a happy spot in the middle where she can be alert but not sick. Thanks for the many prayers. Blessings, Sarah Your support and encouragement over the past 10 days has been incredible! Thank you!
We received the final pathology reports today, and the good news is that the PET scan shows the lymphoma is localized and the bone marrow came back clean. That's encouraging and a huge answer to prayer! Katie's medical team consulted with Mayo Clinic to confirm the diagnosis and treatment plan, and we begin our journey tomorrow (Friday). Katie will be admitted tomorrow and will have her first treatment over the weekend. We know she'll be admitted for 3 days during the treatment, but we will learn more about the timing of future treatments when we meet with her oncologist tomorrow. Prayer Requesrs: 1. We're praying that she will be cancer free at the end of this! 2. That the side effects of the chemo would be minimized. 3. The other kids. Rightfully, Katie has been getting a lot of our attention lately. Pray that God will give us discernment and wisdom on how to care for Katie while still investing in the rest of the clan. Thanks for walking with us! -Chad Last week, our 8-year old daughter quipped in passing, “Do you know if you change one letter scared becomes sacred?” And then in typical Annie fashion, she immediately moved on to the next thing floating around in that head of hers! But, we’re learning that there’s a lot of truth in that statement. Scared: thrown into or being in a state of fear, fright, or panic Sacred: dedicated or set apart for the service or worship of God We think that truth didn’t originate with Annie, but was God’s message to us. He tells us over and over in His Scripture that trials are a part of life in this fallen world. God didn’t give Katie cancer. He hates cancer as much as we do! But, He promises, in some way, to leverage these times of hardship for our good. Romans 8:28 – And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. And so, we take these days where we’re tempted to be scared of the uncertainty and instead see them as sacred moments to spend with our Heavenly Father, the One who sees our pain and meets us in our pain, and who has given us the Holy Spirit to comfort and to guide our way through this time. The support and encouragement from our families, from our church, and from the community has been overwhelming. People truly have been the hands and feet of Christ, generously providing for our physical needs as well as praying on our behalf. Words can’t express our gratitude! Prayer Requests:
Every fight needs a fight song, and we’ve found one that captures our Katie: With my roots deep in You I'll grow the branch that bears the fruit And though I'm small I'll still be standing in the storm. Cause I am planted by the river By Your streams of living water And I'll grow up strong and beautiful All for Your splendor Lord Sacred, not scared. The Cobbs |
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